The Story So Far...

To be very honest, it has been very difficult for me to articulate all that has happened the past two months here at Mission Year.

So here, I will make a list of those events and occurrences  and maybe, I will elaborate on some of these. Please, don't hesitate to ask questions, to post comments below. If there is anything that you are unclear about or want to discuss, please let me know. I want to have a conversation with you. I wouldn't mind at all speaking to you over the phone, or maybe over on Skype or corresponding over email, really. Besides, I'm SUPER grateful for the support that I've been receiving from you, and I want you to be able to share in my experience as much as possible.

So here we grow...

1. A week ago, all of us participating in Mission Year Philadelphia participated in something that one of our leaders at Mission Year, Chris Lahr, introduced to us, called Pauper's Right of Passage (PROP). The idea of PROP is to spend the entire day out in the streets with nothing, no possessions, no money, no cell phone. Nada. I went with one of my housemates, Micheal, downtown to spend the day there. We were encouraged to make interactions of course, as well as to panhandle (why, yes, I'm writing that quite lightly. I did panhandle, and I know that some folks reading this might be offended by this). I encourage you to read Mary's and Katelin's experiences as I got too discouraged early in the process of panhandling that, I didn't continue for too long compared to some of my peers. However, one thing I found in common amongst our experiences were that during the time that we were out in the streets, we noticed that when we asked people for help, that most people would ignore us and pretend that we weren't there. One man in particular told me to go away, which wounded me deeply in how he carried his tone, as if I was someone to be afraid of. Some of my peers had more positive experiences, and the person who helped me get a bottle of water didn't look like he was doing "well off" himself. However, Micheal and I were able to make a few new friends along the way, one of them formally being houseless and another being a girl and her boyfriend whom Micheal visited today and discovered that they were doing well.

I'm still processing so much of that weekend and I wish that I could share it in a more narrative form.

2. I'm taking a classed call "Theology of Poverty" which is taking place out of a partnership between Mission Year and Eastern University. For the first part of my class, we have done Scriptural journals; journals that are based on reflecting on different Scriptures. With this assignment, we've been given questions about the particular Scripture that allows us to reflect on G-d's heart for people and the nature of poverty. With these journals, I've been thinking about how really, we are ALL poor, regardless of whether we are in the United States or in India. We are all hungry and thirsty and needy, but, that hunger and need is manifested in different ways, depending on our lives, depending if we are physically rich or physically poor. Regardless, we are all hungry for love and meaning, acceptance....  Taking this class as a supplement to my Mission Year experience has really challenged me in the way I view myself, and the way I see others, and I see myself with a much more humble perspective, a perspective that has shown me how much the world really needs the love, hope and peace of G-d.

Again, I'm still trying meditating on all of this. I find myself wishing to express myself mostly in poetic or narrative form once again, but, am finding myself unable to at the moment, for I often feel so cramped with time.

3 A lot of what I've been experiencing here is ministry to my own heart. A lot of times, we can partake in programs like these and expect to be the one that is doing the serving and doing the loving. But, I've been learning about how necessary it is for us to be able to go places as disciples of Christ and allow ourselves to be loved by those that we serve or live among. It is dignifying to the other person, and can be dehumanizing if we don't allow folks to give and bless us. Here, I've been seeing how I am experiencing a lot of healing from relationships that wounded me deeply in the past. Being here among so many people like my housemates, who are simply doing their best to show me G-d's love incarnationally in my life, and also spur me on in trusting the ways of Christ, ways of peace and reconciliation... it's been changing me a whole heck of a lot. And I find that important, especially as someone who wants to better understand how deep and wide and long and tall the love of G-d is.

So, the process of sharing with you what is happening and what I'm learning during this time that I am away, has been difficult, because, it can not be described in terms of "missions trip" as I have been taught to think of mission trips. Mission Year isn't a mission trip and at the same time it is. But the thing about Mission Year, is that Mission Year has challenged a lot of what is often thought or done with missions. With Mission Year, I am learning and experiencing a way of life, rather than some goal. Mission Year causes me to think truly about what it means to be a disciple and what it means to make disciples. And this is a time where I find myself experiencing conversion, transformation, within myself, where I've been finding. I've been thinking so much about how Jesus scolded the Pharisees for cleaning only the outside of their bowls, where it doesn't truly count. I thank G-d that I am here, but here in Philly in this time I am seeing that He is helping me clean the inside of my cup with his all consuming fiery love (yay for Christianese! but, hey, it's a dang good metaphor...), as I hope, so that all that I do may be born of the love He has for me. Besides, nothing we do is great if it isn't in love, right?

So, our only goal and our only agenda is to love. We're not here to save Philly. G-d is going to save Philly and the whole word, He already has. And we're only taking part in it. So, my only agenda, or rather, the only agenda that I want to have is to love people and to love G-d. And I think, the first step in love, is to listen, to listen to the needs of others, for that is what G-d does for us, he hears us cry. Our Father has heard us, and has continued to hear us as we call out to Him in all aspects of our lives. The only way I can imagine living is in that same light, to share that love with the world.


From Philly with love,
~Rachel